


Where is my Happy Ending?

by HitMeLightning



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Military, aot - Freeform, snk, survey corps
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-02-20 09:37:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2423930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HitMeLightning/pseuds/HitMeLightning
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You're the main Character in the Story. You joined the Survey Corps and are now in the Castle with your comrades under Capatin Levi's supervision.<br/>You life changed at some point and you swore yourself an oath..<br/>Never be afraid of anyone and never lose your inner Light.</p><p>A/N: The story is not bound to Attack on Titan's storyline. The characters are not mine, except the story.<br/>Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Men's Bathroom is horrible!

It was early morning when you woke up. ‘Another night without a dream’, you thought to yourself. ‘But why?’  
Since that night, you don’t or rather can’t see dreams anymore. It was the day, when you first assigned to the Survey Corps. The most important day of your life. The day you swore an oath. The day you swore to kill all the titans that crossed your way. That day, you swore to never run away, again.

You got up and changed into your Uniform. A quick look in the mirror and you went down to the mess hall. You went up to your friends and greeted them all. “Hey, (y/n), what took you so long?”, Sasha asked. She is one of your best friends, since you joined the military. She immediately liked you, after the day you shared half of your food with her. You never had much appetite, and most of your food was either eaten by Sasha or thrown away.   
“Don’t know, I guess I overslept. But anyway, what do we have to do today?” you asked looking at your comrades. Everyone’s faced turned into a frown. “Today we have to clean the whole place.” Armin told you. He was sitting right next to Eren and Sasha. “I don’t understand why we have to clean up, I mean we are all soldiers! We should rather train how to kill titans than learn how to be a proper maid!” Eren ranted. ‘He’s right’ you thought. “Anyway, come on let’s eat! I am starving!” Sasha exclaimed. You sat down and ate you breakfast (half of it).  
~  
You all stood in a line, awaiting your new duties. Lance Corporal Levi and Petra stood in front of you.  
“Cadets listen up. Everyone gets a job, which you all are going to do in the best way possible. I will check if your work was enough or not. If not, your going to do it again and get some extra work, is that clear?” The Corporal looked at you all with his grey steel eyes.  
“Yes, sir!” The cadets shouted in unison. “Now get to work!”  
~  
“Am I the only one who thinks, that the captain is very terrifying? Or is just me?” Sasha asked. Sasha, Bertholt, Connie and you were cleaning up the mess hall. The most annoying job in the castle, because it is the dirtiest one off all, except the men’s bathroom.  
“No it’s not just you, Sasha. He’s so Intimidating. I hate it!“ Connie chimed in. “His cold stare is the worst. My legs start to shake whenever he looks that way to us and that is all the time!” You all laughed and in that second the corporal stood at the door. “What is going on here? I guess your all done with your work, because your annoying laughing can be heard in the hallway. Now, step away I’m going to check your work.” He started to walk around the room and checking every corner. “Who was responsible for the tables?” He looked angrily at you all. “Me, sir!” you shouted and saluted.  
“Your work is lamentable. Do it again and then go upstairs and help cleaning the men’s bathroom. You others can carry on.” His gaze as cold as ever. “B-but sir! The Men’s Bathroom? Please I would do any other work, but it is horrible up th-there! Please, capt-“ - “You will do as I say, cadet. Now, get started or you get more work to do.” He left the room without any other comment.  
“I think I’m gonna throw up now. The men’s bathroom? THE MEN’S BATHROOM?! Why?” you sat down on a chair. “Come on, it’s not that bad.” Bertholt tried to ensure you. “Do you believe what you just said? That bathroom of yours is so filthy and disgusting and, and…” you trembled in horror eyes widened. You were once there, because you lost a bet to Jean and he told you to go in the men’s bathroom to see yourself how disgusting it was, since you didn’t believe him when he ranted about it.  
You were right, it was horrible. It smelled awful and the toilets were not properly cleaned up.   
You shook your head after the pictures appeared in your head. ‘No way I’m gonna go again in there, ever!’ You promised yourself that day. ‘Never again!’  
Now, you stood right infront of that door, ready to get it over with.

 

Please feel free to share yout thoughts in the comment box! Your opinions are always appreciated!  
Much much love, Lightning.


	2. That place is a disgrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter, I tried to make it a bit longer so I would appreciate it, if you leave comments about how you liked it.   
> Love, Lightning

You were walking back to your room after you finished up your cleaning. On your way, you encountered Petra and she softly smiled at you. “Hey (y/n), I was looking for you. How are you?” You stood in front of her with tired eyes, a green face and your hair in a mess. “Not okay.” You answered quietly. “I know what you had to do, I saw it on the list.” She looked at you sympathetically. You just weakly smiled at her. “The Captain’s awaiting you in his office. He said he has to talk to you about something important, I guess.” You were surprised, when he told you to clean up the men’s bathroom you thought that he properly did not want to see you again that day. “Alright, I just gotta change very quickly and –“ “No, (y/n) he said you should come right up to his office when you were finished cleaning.” You were annoyed. Beyond annoyed. You were looking awful. You wanted to shower and clean yourself up, but now your plan was destroyed. “Okay, thank you Petra.” You smiled again and headed to the captains office.  
~  
Knock. Knock. “Name and business?” You heard the Captains voice from inside. “Cadet (l/n), you wished to speak with me, sir!” “Come in.” You opened the door and saw the captain sitting in front of his desk doing some paperwork. He didn’t look at you. “Cadet (l/n), your work in the mess hall was disappointing today. Did you never learn to-“ He cut off when he lifted his gaze to look up to you. His eyes showed a bit of shock. “You look disgusting. How can you dare to come to my office like this, Cadet? I’m your superior.” His looked at you like he was looking on something filthy and dirty in front of him – like he was disgusted. You were even more annoyed than you were before. You were also angry and tired. That was not a good combination.   
“Sir, I just finished cleaning and when I WANTED to change my clothes, Petra told me to come up here immediately. I did not have the chance to change, sir! Now, you tell me that I look disgusting, I know that myself because I had to clean up the Men’s Bathroom, sir. You must know yourself how much of a disgrace that place is, Captain!” You said harshly with a cold and angry look on your face. The Captain just stared at you. You couldn’t read his emotions, and just waited.   
“How dare you talk like this to me?” His strong gaze fixed on you. “I didn’t mean to offend you, sir!”  
“Enough. Leave.” He turned back to his paperwork. “Wait. Tomorrow morning at 5, you get my breakfast and tea. Now, back to your room.” You saluted quietly and turned on your heel to leave the room.  
~  
You were lying on your bed. You were never a girl who would be afraid of something. You never felt fear, especially not towards a man. Not even the Commander with his hard look and his tremendous physique made you feel the way the Captain made you feel.  
‘How is that possible?’ ‘ You are brave. You are kindhearted and you are passionate. Never forget that!’  
You remembered these words. The words that made you feel so shining. The smile on his face, whenever he told you these words..  
With these words in your mind you fell asleep.   
~  
It was 4:59 am and you had the breakfast and the Captain’s Tea in a tray in your hands.  
Knock. Knock.   
“Come in.” you heard the Corporal’s voice from inside. You entered the room and went straight up to the Captain. He was, like yesterday, sitting on his chair and doing some paperwork. A short look on his clock and the Captain turned his face to you. “Good. You’re punctual, and cleaned up. Today you will suffer the consequences for your behavior, yesterday.”  
‘What?’ “Sir, with all respect, I don’t get what I did yesterday to deserve this.” You said in a hard tone and an angry face.  
“You must now, (l/n), I hate dirt. I especially hate it, when someone steps into my office and is filthy and awful smelling. So, you tell me, how did you dare to come in like that? I told Petra to get you, but I did not tell her to send you up here all this dirty.” He said as coldly as ever. He was not just staring at you, no.. It felt like he was staring through you.   
‘That damn Petra..’ You thought to yourself. She told you to come up to the Captain’s office immediately, didn’t she? ‘No way I’m gonna forget this’.  
“You are right, sir! I shouldn’t have done that. I will undergo any punishment you have for me. Again, I’m sorry Captain Levi!” You boasted and saluted to support your statement.  
The Corporal looked a bit surprised but shook it off right away. “Good. Cadet (y/n), you will help in the Kitchen today. For breakfast, lunch and dinner. Of course, you still have to attend the training.” He then glanced at the clock again. “Now, go. You have work to do.”  
~  
At breakfast you helped the cooks with preparing the breakfast for the soldiers. The cook send you off, after you were finished with setting up the food on the buffet.  
“Oi, (y/n), how did you feel cleaning up the men’s bathroom, yesterday?” Jean grinned at you.  
“Very funny. You know what? At least NOW you filthy males can take a nice shit in there after I cleaned up your disgusting bathroom. You all should be very grateful, I did a good job up there!” You snapped. The girls were all laughing now, and most of the boys were laughing too. “Yeah she’s right. She did a good job. Thanks (Y/N).” Reiner smiled at you. “Yeah, thank you too Reiner. And eat that Jean.” You said looking at Jean with an amused look.  
~  
After this endless day of work, you wanted nothing else but sleep. You were about to head to your room, when you saw Petra in the hallway. You went up to her. “Petra, I have to talk with you.” You began. “Yeah, sure! What’s up?” she smiled at you.   
‘Tch.’ you saw right through her façade. “Why did you lie to me, yesterday? What were you thinking when you send me up to the Captain’s office and especially when YOU must know better than everyone else that he hates dirt, and I was covered in several layers of dirt? Do you know that I had to undergo a punishment for that? I want an explanation. Now.” You said harsh and coldly. You looked in her face to see a glimpse of amusement in her face but as soon as she realized that you were staring at her resentfully she turned her face into a sad frown. “ Look, (Y/N). I didn’t know that you got a punishment for that. The Captain said that he wanted to speak to you about something very important, so I thought that you have to immediately go to him. Again, I’m sorry.” Your expression didn’t change. You knew people. You just knew them. You learned to see right through people, you learned to see through people’s lies. And you saw right through Petra’s lie. She wasn’t honest with you. She was hiding something. You guts told you that she didn’t like you. You felt it, but you didn’t know why.  
“Alright, I believe you,” you lied “Alight, I want to go to bed now. Good Night.” You faked a smile and went passed her. “Good Night, (Y/N)!” she chirped. You felt how your anger grew. You were boiling.  
‘This is not over. She will understand to not mess with me again. I want respect and I will get it.’


	3. Chapter 3 - You look great.

The next day you were really tired, the work of the day before was hitting you hard. You back was hurting and your legs were aching really bad. But you grew up to know that it is easier to hide your pain and just to fake a ‘I’m fine’.  
You went down to the mess hall as always. You greeted everyone and sat at a table alone. You were not feeling very well and the last thing you wanted was to hear show everyone how miserable you looked. But that was not a good idea.  
“Heeeeeyy!! (Y/N)!! What are you doing!” You heard Sasha screaming and running towards you. “Yeah, (Y/N) what are you doing over here alone?” You heard Berthold, who was now walking over to your table with everyone else. “You must know, you’re so important to us, that we all changed the table for you!” you heard Krista, who was now sitting on the left of you. Everyone else now sat on your table. “Hm. You don’t look so well.” You turned your head to see Reiner staring at you. He was very close to your face. “No. I just have a little headache. I haven’t slept much yesterday. But I’m fine.” You tuned back to the food, which was placed in front of you. A slice of bread, a steamed potato and a cup of tea. You weren’t really hungry, so you just drank your tea. “The work yesterday was too much, wasn’t it? You also had to attend the training.. You must actually be really tired. You worked till midnight yesterday and you woke up very early. (Y/N), are you really feeling okay?” Everyone was now staring at you. You felt uncomfortable. No one ever asked or rather was interested in how you were, how you felt or if you were sick. So this was not something you were used to. “Guys, I’m alright. My muscles are a bit sore but nothing serious. Anyway, I think I go upstairs and shower very quickly. See you guys at training. With that you stood up, fast, too fast. Your head felt dizzy and everything was spinning. The last thing you heard was your name before everything went black.  
~  
“(Y/N), (Y/N) please wake up!” You heard a small voice. You carefully opened your eyes. Hange, Sasha and Krista were standing in the room, worriedly looking at you.  
“Hey, what.. happened?” you asked, your voice quiet and husky. “You fainted in the mess hall and if Reiner wouldn’t have caught you, you would have hit you head pretty hard on the floor! We carried you up here and Hange took care of you.” Sasha explained to you. You fainted? Just because you worked a bit more the day before? ‘Weak…’ you thought to yourself. When you were younger you worked twice as much in half the time and you never fainted. You couldn’t believe yourself. You were so strong, so full of life and now.. You were weak. ‘You can’t be weak! You can’t afford to be weak! You have to be strong! (Y/N), You have to be..’ the small flashback appeared in your head. It gave you pain, not just mentally but also physically. “I want to go back to my room please. Thank you Captain Hange, for taking care of me. Goodbye.” You were about to walk out of the door, before Hange stopped you. “(Y/N), take it easy. You should rest for the rest of the day. You’re free to go, and rest well!” She smiled at you. “No, I have to go to our training in an hour. I’m fine. I just-“ “No way (Y/N)! You going to rest and nothing more. You are excused from the training today. I talk to Erwin, now go!” “But Captain Hange, Corporal Levi will punish me for this, like yesterday. I don’t want to work in the kitchen again. More important, I don’t want another punishment. Yesterday was enough. I need to go the training.” You objected. “(Y/N) I said no. And if you attend the training, I will punish you. And I won’t go as easy as shorty with you. Trust mee~” And with that she shoved you out the door.  
~  
Back in your room you thought about the words that echoed in your brain. ‘You have to be strong. (Y/N), you have to be..’. You put off your clothes and looked at yourself in the mirror. You were shocked.  
You were very thin, your bones were sticking out, you were pale, paler than you already were. Your (H/C), (H/L) hair was now looking scruffy and feeble. You looked sick.  
You couldn’t believe it, this wasn’t you. You were full of life, healthy and very beautiful. You had always a pale skin color, but you always had a slight rose tone on your cheeks. Your (H/C) hair was soft and radiant and your eyes were always shining. You had a delicate physique, you were small but you looked petite. You were so different now. ‘What happened? What have I done? Why did I let myself go like this? Oh yeah, I remember. I lost everything that was Important to me.’ And with that you turned away from the mirror and lay down and tried to sleep. You couldn’t.  
The flashbacks shot in your head. All the memories of the years returned. Everything that ever happened to you, the good things and the bad things, the nice memories as well as the bad ones appeared in your head.  
Everything felt as if you were there again. Back in time, back when you were younger, when you were naïve, when you were believing in the world. Back then, when you were happy…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry guys, a small cliffhanger.. :)  
> I know it's a small Chapter but I'm working on it..  
> Love you guys and thank you for leaving Kudos :))  
> Much Much Love, Lightning.


	4. And Flashbacks suck, too.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys FINALLY a new Chapter is updated! Yeah!
> 
> Now just for your information: In this Chapter are a many many flashbacks, so be prepared.  
> I also tried to add some drama to it and also some funny stuff.  
> I hope it worked :)
> 
> Pleaaase please leave some comments and give me your opinion on my story it will be highly appreciated!  
> I'm also very open to critics to improve my work.
> 
> Love you guys so much and enjoy!
> 
> Much Much Love, Lightning.

_A couple years ago.._

„(Y/N)! (Y/N)!!“ you heard the voice you loved so much, the voice which was… Family. “(Y/N), what are you doing? Come on, we have to go!” the person spoke again and this time was pulling on your arm. “We have to leave or we are going to die! Come on!!!” with a pull, you were on your legs.

“No, NO! I can’t leave him here, I can’t! You go I’ll stay here. Just leave without me.” You spoke silently. You couldn’t leave him back here, or rather, you couldn’t leave without him. Not without **him**.

“(Y/N), I promised that I will take care of you, I promised him, and no matter what happens, I will always protect you! And you promised too! Now if you won’t walk, I will carry you!” He threw you on his shoulder and started to run. Fast. Faster.

Fire. Ashes. Dead bodies. Blood.

People were running, screaming and being devoured. You were crying. Tears blurred your sight. Nothing of this should have happened. Nothing.

‘Why? Why is this happening? What did I do to deserve this? Wasn’t I a good person? Did I hurt someone?’ You thought. You thought and thought but nothing would change the fact that everything was in ashes.

“We are almost at the gate! (Y/N) hold on tight I will get us over the wall! “ with that he used the gear to pull us up. On the wall he let you finally down. You were a mess. Crying, sobbing and just letting all the tears and feelings out.

You heard sobs in front of you. And you saw tears falling to the ground. You looked up to see the man who just saved you, the man who was family, breaking down.

You were so selfish. An Egoist.

How could you cry, when the man right before your eyes lost the only family, the only **real** family he had? It was **his** brother, who died. And you were being so selfish that you would die to leave him all alone in this cruel world? How could you?

~

Damn. Every little feeling that you had that day swelled right up again. Why did you remember all this stuff again?

Right. You wanted to remember the oath you made that day. To yourself and to him. The oath you wanted to keep, no matter what happened. Remember. But that was the wrong memory. Deeper. A little more back. ‘I need the right memory. I need to remember my oath.’

~

“(Y/N). I will die soon. So listen up.” “NO, I will get you out, I call for help, there must be someone to-“

“Stop and listen to me. These will be my last words to you. So please, listen.” Your tears were freely streaming down your face now.

“You should know, that I never regretted staying here with you. I know you thought that I always regretted to give up my dream to join the Scouts to stay here with you. But I didn’t. You are the most important thing in my life and I would have given up everything to be with you.” He coughed up blood and swallowed hard. “(Y/N). You are **brave**. You are **kindhearted** and you are **passionate**. Never forget that.” The words you heard so often and made you feel like the most special girl in the whole world. “So now, I want you to promise me something.” “ANYTHING!” you cried out.

He small chuckle, followed by another bloody cough. “Promise me, that no matter what happened and no matter what will happen, you will live. You will survive. Your live is the most valuable thing on this world now. Don’t throw it away. Promise?”

~

That was the right moment. You turned in your bed. This was painful. Remembering.

It isn’t easy. It is never easy. It will never be easy. But you had to. Remember what happened, so you will not forget. Not again. A little bit more. One more time.

~

“I will swear an oath to you. My promise.

I swear, that I will value my life and I will survive. I will live.

I swear to you, that I will be the strongest soldier in this world!

I swear I will join the Scouts to prove humanity that my life is not pointless! I swear that I will destroy the Titans and take back what is ours!

And finally, I swear, I will never forget you and your memory will be my guide. I love you.” His hand was entwined with yours. This was the last time you saw him. The last time you heard his voice. And the last time, you felt truly happy.

~

Fuck. It hurt. But you remembered. And this gave you a wakeup-call. And it was about damn time.

And slowly, you felt the energy spreading through your body.

~~

In the next three weeks, you changed everything in your life. You wanted to become the person you swore to be, and the person you used to be.

You ate a lot, trained even harder and got as much sleep as you could. You were lucky, that Captain Levi and his Elite squad, which was including him, Petra, Eld, Gunther and Oluo, were on a mission on special request in Wall Sina. Not something important, but they stayed there for two weeks, and the next week you were even luckier, when you didn’t had to talk to Captain Shorty or Petra.

These three weeks made a difference and everyone noticed it.

~~

“Hey guys, how are you today?” You sat down next to the other recruits. “Lookin’ good today (Y/N).” You heard Reiner say, who was looking over to you. You gave him a soft smile. “We have the day off, so you can tell I’m very happy.” Everyone started laughing and talking about what to do today. The Captain would never give you a day off, unless he had to do something important. So it was a special day.

You all decided to just relax and spend the day outside on the field in front of the giant Castle. (A/N: In this Story you are staying in that Castle which was shown in Episode 15)

As you were all sitting in the sun and just talking about random stuff, Eld came towards you. “Damn, I bet Corporal Shorty has some cleaning order, he won’t let us even stay one day off of work!” you heard Jean complain. ‘It’s always the same’ you thought.

“Hey (Y/N), the Captain wants to see you.” “Why?” “Come on just follow me.” You slowly stood up. Annoyed was literally written on your face. ‘3 weeks without him was too much to ask, was it?’ you were rolling your eyes. Your comrades were making funny faces which were indirectly directed towards your beloved Captain. You laughed and gave them a thumbs up and a wink. They were good guys and they were dear to you. They supported you decision to change yourself and even helped you with it. Sasha hold herself back to not eat your food away and Jean just put more an more food on your plate. Reiner, Eren, Mikasa and Armin helped you with your training and Connie, Krista, Bertholt and even Ymir made sure that you got enough sleep. You couldn’t even describe how much this meant to you. Finally, after all this time you felt happy again.

“Stop.” Eld stopped in the hall and turned towards you. You were confused. “Shouldn’t I go to the Captain’s office? I don’t want to be late, you know, he has a favor for punishments.” “No, (Y/N) the Captain didn’t call you to his office, I just wanted to talk to you.. in private.” He stopped and just looked at you. ‘Talk to me in private? Why would he want that?’ different ideas flew through your head. They were cut short when Eld started talking again. “So.. I noticed you changed a lot in these past weeks. After I came back from the mission I was kind of shocked about how much you changed.” A soft smile was placed on his lips. “Yeah, I decided that I want control over my life back. So this is what happens, if I have the control over me, not my past.” The flashbacks shot through your head. You started to feel the pain of a headache. “I see. That was a pretty good decision you made there. I mean, you look better now.” You raised your brow. “Gosh, not that you looked ugly.. I mean not good before!” He stuttered. You laughed at how goofy and lost he looked. It was very amusing.

“So you called me here to tell me that I changed and that you noticed it? You could’ve told me that in front of the others too.” “I have to tell you something else. “Look (Y/N) the reason I wanted to talk to you was..”

~

_Happening at the same time when you are walking towards the castle with Eld._

Chuckling.

He looked up from his desk. “What are you laughing about, Petra.” The not-so-tall Corporal of the Scout Regiment was looking at the girl, who was looking out the window, down to the field. “Oh, nothing I was laughing about Eld.” she chuckled again. “Hm?” he took a sip of his tea. “He wants to propose his feelings towards Cadet (Y/L/N). He looks very nervous. I didn’t think that he would do it though, but I am glad that he got the courage to-“ “Towards (Y/N)?” the Captain had a harsh tone in his voice. The girl spun over to Captain Levi and was puzzled. “Yes, (Y/N).” she repeated slowly. Petra felt envious at his reaction. ‘Why was he so interested in her? She is just another Cadet, isn’t she? She is nothing special.. Yeah she changed since we got back, but she is still the same.’ The Capatin interrupted her thoughts. “He has a fiancée.” another sip of his cup. Petra responded with a not-so-polite-tone. “He HAD a fiancée. She broke the engagement two months ago. That’s why he was so distracted and sad the past month. Didn’t you notice Captain?” No answer. “I was very worried. She didn’t even give him a real reason for the break. I’m just glad that he feels better now. He deserves this.” She was looking over to the desk were her Captain was sitting. She was trying to read his thoughts, but as always it was pointless. No one knew what he was thinking or feeling. He was a mystery.

The raven haired man was just half listening to what the blonde girl was saying. His mind was distracted.

“Alright I will get myself another tea. You bring these Documents over to Hange, and tell her that she has to sign these.” He handed her a couple folders. After that you are free to do what you want.” He walked out of his office. His pace was quick, but not too quick, so that no one would notice. He was impatient and he felt like he wanted to run down the stairs to the hall.

~

_Back to you and Eld._

“Look (Y/N) the reason I wanted to talk to you was-“ “Cadet (Y/L/N).” you heard the familiar but nerve-wrecking voice of the Captain. “Yes, Captain!” you saluted him. “I need to speak to you up in my office, now.” ‘Why the hell me?’ “Of course Captain, I will be right there.. Eld, let’s talk later when I come back.” Eld nodded to you and to the Captain and went outside.

You followed the Captain into his room. “Sit.” He commanded. You sat down on his chair which was placed in front of his desk. Opposite to the chair you were sitting on was another chair that you were looking at to avoid eye contact. “Captain? Did I do something wrong?” a small frown was on your lips. Steel colored eyes were now examining your face. It was quite.

“Everyone of my squad noticed that you changed. You are placed under my supervision, I have to know what happened. I also have to report everything to Commander Erwin and if something happened, I need to know.” He slowly walked over to the chair opposite to you and this time, he looked you dead in the eye. “Is it this obvious that I changed? I just wanted to take my responsibilities serious and I can’t be a proper soldier, if I don’t give everything I can I would feel like betraying my duties. That’s why I did it. No other reason, Captain.”

“I understand. But why now? You could’ve done this when you joined the military. Or the first time you got here. What made you change your mind?” his eyes were still starring into yours. Deeply.

_» I swear I will join the Scouts to prove humanity that my life is not pointless! I swear that I will destroy the Titans and take back what is ours!«_

A Flashback shot through your brain. It made the headache worse.

“Looking at a mirror made me realize it.” You grinned. He didn’t show any reaction. As always. “Am I free to go now?” Silence. He looked.. weird. You couldn’t read his mind. He looked so concentrated, like he had to say something really important.

Knock. Knock. A door opening “Captain I brought the documents back you send me for-“ Petra stopped in her tracks and starred at you wide-eyed. “Petra, I didn’t tell you to bring these documents back.” He was.. angry? He grabbed the documents and sat back on his desk. His eyes roamed over the documents. “I thought that you needed them back so I just.. Sorry Captain.” She was sad? You were really bad at reading emotions off people’s faces and you didn’t have the nerve to do it. “Captain am I free to go?” you asked again. Silence.

Petra starred at you, this time you were sure she was annoyed. But you didn’t really care.

“Perfect.” Your head shot back to the Captain. After another moment of silence he spoke.

“I have to attend the Court and I need someone to come along. Cadet (Y/L/N) you will accompany me. We will be leaving tomorrow at 5 in the morning. Be punctual. You will need nothing but your pass. You should rest now, tomorrow will be a long day.” Perplexed you looked at him. “What.. Why..” you were lost. What was happening? Another moment of silence.

Realization hit you like a rock. “WHAT? Me? Why me?” mixed emotions were flowing through you. Mostly negative. “Captain, I could accompany you. It would be easier for you to let me accompany you, because-“

“No, Petra. I already made my decision. Now, go right up and get some sleep. This is also an order. Tomorrow at 5. Now go.”

A headache was now fully present. Your brain hurt.

‘This damn I-am-short-but-I-have-authority-wannabe-captain. He sucks. And Flashbacks suck too.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a long chapter :D
> 
> Thank you for reading and leave me some comments, pretty please!
> 
> If you have problems understanding something, you are free to ask!
> 
> Much Much Love, Lightning.


	5. Author's Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey my lovely Readers,
> 
> I am so so sorry, that I still haven't postet a new Chapter yet. I've been so busy currently, that I didn't have the time to write or even start a chapter yet. I just started at a new University and I haven’t really adjusted to it yet. I just hope you can forgive me and will still read my stuff   
> I really love you guys and I will start working on the new Chapter as soon as possible.  
> I will keep you posted.
> 
> Much Much Love, Lightning.

Hey my lovely Readers,

I am so so sorry, that I still haven't postet a new Chapter yet. I've been so busy currently, that I didn't have the time to write or even start a chapter yet. I just started at a new University and I haven’t really adjusted to it yet. I just hope you can forgive me and will still read my stuff :)

 

I really love you guys and I will start working on the new Chapter as soon as possible.  
I will keep you posted.

Much Much Love, Lightning.


End file.
